Tuesday, October 31st
Happy Halloween! What better way to celebrate than to take a spooooooky overnight flight from Seattle to London? Ooooooooh. The flight went fairly well, even though I got little to no sleep. I did get to watch a baby at the front of the plane cry and scream for several hours, and I watched Mission: Impossible III, one of several movies offered in-flight, on a tiny screen with a blue burned out pixel (with Jason, my travelling companion [my Mystery Guest?] jokingly saying that the pixel would be the one thing that would ruin the movie Click).
How I made an ass of myself in a foreign country:
- Tripped while boarding the plane and was politely told by a flight attendant to "Mind my step."
- Didn't think that Left-Side Flight Attendant was talking to me when he was offering me my meal options, and therefore ignored him for several seconds before finally blurting out, "Are you talking to me?" (and no, it wasn't De Niro-style. I wish.)
- Gawked stupidly at the same flight attendant when, after telling him I'd like some tea, he handed me an empty tray. He sighed and said, "Just place your tea cup onto the tray and I'll get it for you." Left-Side Flight Attendant thinks I'm an idiot.
Ooh, London! After arriving, I familiarized myself with the London Underground. I liked it so much that I familiarized myself for 28 stops and one transfer! Actually, it was just a long ride from the airport.
Tired, smelly, and excited
I checked into my hotel, washed the travel stink off me, and left to meet Lisa Ditlefsen (Lisadit on the SEOmoz blog) for dinner. She told us to meet at Bond Street Station, unaware that there are actually five entrances to Bond Street Station. Jason and I crankily wandered around the station for forty-five minutes before we were able to get ahold of her. Once we found each other, we ate at a Turkish restaurant and had some drinks.
Fun facts about Lisa:
- She's from Norway, but has lived in England for about 9 years
- She's a big fan of SEOmoz (awwww yeah)
- She does all of the SEO for her marketing company
- She was fascinated with the gluttonous deliciousness of Jack in the Box restaurants when she visited the United States
- One of her favorite movies is Big Trouble in Little China (an admirable admission, I must admit)
Me and Lisa
How I made an ass of myself in a foreign country:
- I needed change for a pound so I could use the pay phone and call Lisa, so I asked a news vendor if he could make change. He looked at me strangely and was like, "What do you mean?" Still holding my hand out, I repeatedly asked him for change (how can Londoners not know what change is, for crying out loud?) until he finally said, "Change for what?" That's when I looked down at my hand and saw that the pound had slipped into my mitten, so to him it looked like some crazy Yank was holding her hand out, begging for money. I'm an idiot.
- At the Turkish restaurant I asked the waiter where the bathroom was, and he gave me a confused look. I tried "rest room," and he continued to stare at me until another waiter pointed me in the right direction. I can't bring myself to ask where the "toilet" is--it just sounds too weird.
I took a bus tour of London, which was a good way to orient myself and get an idea of where everything is. We stopped at St. Paul's Cathedral and oohed and ahhed over how impressive-looking it is. We also marveled at how windy and narrow the cathedral's stairs are; in fact, at 6'4", Travelling Companion had to be careful not to bash his head on several different occasions while in London. From St. Paul's we went to the Tower of London, but we didn't know it was closing less than an hour after we arrived. One of the warders gave us re-admission tickets for the next day so we could come back and explore the Tower some more at no extra charge. Hooray!
The Tower of London
With London's revered theatre scene, you're probably wondering which show I absolutely had to see. Was it The Cantebury Tales? Chicago? (starring Ashlee Simpson, which the ad posters claimed was "America's Sweetheart." At this point I was starting to think that London didn't know much about the U.S.) Caberet? Please. My tastes are clearly more refined than standard theatre fare, so I spent about $35 U.S. at Picadilly Circus for two tickets to see...Borat! Make fun all you want, but I know what my priorities are, and that day my priorities were to see cultural learnings of America for make benefit glorious nation of Kazakhstan. And it was damn funny.
How I made an ass of myself in a foreign country:
- Tripped while running up the escalator out of a tube station and had a woman ask me in a very British accent, "Ah yew oh-KAY?"
- When I saw the Tower of London, I excitedly exclaimed, "Ooh, can we go there? Does it cost money?", forgetting that I had already bought admission tickets an hour beforehand.
- Had a waiter laugh at me when I asked him, "Do you know where the restroom is? I mean, the looooooooooo?" (and yes, I put that many "ooooohs" in "loo")
- Almost got hit by a car/double decker bus/cyclist no less than 6 times (this was throughout the trip, not in one day. And it's also not because the traffic is backwards in London; I actually had a driver wave at me to cross but still refused to slow down. Drivers don't seem to like pedestrians, and pedestrians seem to love to jaywalk right in front of oncoming traffic. It all combined to make for a terrifying on-foot experience.)
In the morning I changed hotel locations from Maida Vale (which was about a fifteen minute tube ride to central London) to County Hall, which is right next to the London Eye. I experienced the Tower of London 2: Electric Boogaloo, then took a short tour boat trip up the River Thames (which is a lovely shade of murky brown) and marvelled at the size and beauty of Westminster Abbey and Parliament. That evening I met Will Critchlow, Director of WandD, for drinks.
Fun facts about Will:
- He's a big fan of SEOmoz (really now, who isn't? Wait, don't answer that or you'll make me sad.)
- He loves scotch so much that he bought a cask of it and is waiting for it to age enough to make for a kickin' good drink
- He can explain the rules of cricket to two semi-drunk Americans
- He wrote a paper on auction theory, which I don't even want to try to comprehend. Math is scary.
- He firmly earned a spot in Rebecca's Big Book of Generous Blokes for buying me and Jason three pints of beer each
Will and me
How I made an ass of myself in a foreign country:
I actually behaved myself today and did America proud. Wahoo!
Saturday, November 4th
I started off the day with Irish stew at Tipperary, an Irish pub. I also pondered over what on Earth "brown sauce" is.
What the hell?
I saw the Royal Courts of Justice, Twinings, the oldest tea shop in London, and spent a couple hours at the British Museum. The British Museum was awesome. You can take pictures of pretty much anything in there, and you can even touch some stuff, such as ginormous Egyptian sculptures that are thousands of years old. Plus, it's free admission. Very cool, indeed.
How I made an ass of myself in a foreign country:
I didn't really make an ass of myself so much as killed my feet. I spent the entire day walking around London. It probably equated to several miles. Good exercise, good way to see the city, not ideal walking shoes. Ouchers.
Sunday, November 5th
My last full day in London. Frowny face. For the record, the weather in London had been terrifically sunny throughout my trip. It made for great sightseeing. I started off my morning by getting a bird's eye view of the city from the London Eye, then walked to Trafalgar Square and saw some Monets, Manets, and Van Goghs at the National Gallery. From there I took the tube to Victoria Station to buy my train ticket to Worthing for the following day, then walked to Buckingham Palace, through Hyde Park, and to Harrod's, a huge and obscenely expensive department store.
How I made an ass of myself in a foreign country:
- Griped that I wasn't that impressed with all of the religious paintings at the National Gallery because they all consist of a group of fat and pale people poking at Jesus
- Couldn't believe that I was charged the equivalent of $7.00 U.S for a side of vegetables that largely consisted of lima beans. Does anyone like lima beans? I know London's expensive, but I could get about seven boxes of Safeway Select brand lima beans at the store for the same price. Jeez.
So long, London! It's been fun!
DUDE! Fat, pale people pointing at jesus might be the single funniest thing I have read in months!!
This blog was hilarious
Thanks--I'm glad to see I didn't leave sense of humor in the U.S. :D
Hi Rebecca.
It was great to meet you and Jason, and again I'm so sorry you had to spend a ridicoulous amount of time at Bond Street Station waiting for me. In the meantime I was running around like a headless chicken outside trying to figure out which of the five exsits had a phone box outside. Waving to some poor people trying to make a phone call..
It was a really nice evening, next time I'm taking you out on the piss though (meaning getting seriously drunk).
And don't you laugh at Big Trouble in Little China, it rocks =)
Try Waterloo at rush hour, I thought Grand Central was nuts.
An American in London.
Seems to me that the UK and the US have some unresolved issues and should get some therapy...
Am I the only one that got your american werewolf in london reference? :)
I was actually shooting for the movie "An American in Paris," but "An American Werewolf in London" also works. Theeeeeere's a bad moon on the rise!
Yes, sorry about that. We have told Adam before about wearing a belt when he adjusts the cables at the back of PCs at ground level, but he never remembers.
I will be in Paris tomorrow, we can still make it work. ;-)
Thes are all very Bridget Jones. I laughed and laughed!
I love the "Starbucks" sign behind you in the picture where you're pondering brown sauce. You can't escape Seattle, no matter where you go.
I love that! I always wanted to go to england! you're awesome, your my hero! you look like you really had fun! I'm going some day too!
Haha, wow, hero? Gee, thanks!
The post was hilarious -- and fun.
No making fun of "Big Trouble in Little China" though. It's the genesis of this:
- I must just be so monumentally naive. - You are.
Sounds like a fun trip; I have been all over the EU the past 2 weeks myself at my office in Richmond (UK) and off to Paris Thursday. Speaking of strange brown stuff, have you ever tried Vegemite? They have something similar in the UK to it, awful stuff. I can’t recall the name right now. Next time you are out you should pick up a local SIM card, it’s really cheap to have a mobile out here. I have a pack of SIM cards for every country I go when I am on Vacation. Rates calling the US are usually pretty good.
The UK version of Vegemite is Marmite. I used to agree that it was foul, but a (long since ex) partner convinced me to get to like it...
The things we do for love eh?
And yes, local SIMs are a good idea
HAHA! I will eat almost anything just to try it. But I got the feeling was eating dried up beer that was left in the bar gutter.
For love I will take someone to the airport, but food I hate is an automatic boot in the a@@ out the door.
"But I got the feeling was eating dried up beer that was left in the bar gutter."
That'd be because, in a way, you were. It's made from yeast extract, which is a by-product of brewing beer.
Hence I think Marmite should follow their risky ad strategy (You love it or hate it - showing people who hate marmite) with the following tagline: "Marmite - for those who like mouldy beer scum!"
Haven't tried Vegemite (which is banned in the U.S., apparently), but Ammon and Adam keep pushing blood sausage on me...I may have to Fear Factor it up and give it a go.
If blood sausage is what we Brits call Black Pudding, it's worth a shot. Once you get over the *ick* factor, it's actually quite nice.
Black Pudding, that's the one. I wonder if it caused the Black Death...
Definitely try black pudding. A true classic.
No comment.
...Possible. I always knew that the world record attempt for the largest mass black pudding eating, which happened only days before, was a strange co-incidence. Maybe now we've solved the mystery!
It all seems so obvious now...
I actually like the Blood Sausage.
Whatever you do, don't try Vegemite.
Don't.
I'm serious.
Awww, you hurt Jane's feelings.
Aaron, Tell us more about the SIM card. What kind of cell do you need to make them work and where do you get that hardware? How long do the SIMS last once you buy them / add cash to them? Thanks!
Most American providers lock your phone so you can't use other SIM cards. Ask them to unlock it - some will, some won't & others want you to pay. Then you can just find a provider in different countries that will sell you a SIM with either prepaid minutes or they will just bill you like your current carrier. Some US phones also don't even use SIM cards (CDMA phones) so you will just have to ask your provider.
Actually most of our cell phones are locked, however there are unlock codes for every phone. Some you can get online and some small shops in London know the codes and will charge around 10-20 Sterling to unlock your phone. It will not change the way your phone works, it just lets you go in a store like Vodafone and pickup a pre-pay SIM card for about 20 Sterling and then you can top it up anywhere. I have cards for the UK,NL,DE and AU countries.
You would need a triband mobile phone using the GSM standard. In the America's the frequency mobile phones are using is 1900Mhz, in Europe, Asia and Africa it's 900/1800Mhz. You can also just buy a cheap prepaid GSM cellphone (900/1800) for around $40,-
Friday was fun - great to meet you both. Not sure I did the rules of cricket justice, but then it is a bit of a silly game. Glad we talked basketball too :)
I've been a long-time reader of the 'moz but now you've inspired me to create an account and get commenting. I'll even crop Friday's photo for my profile since it's the only one I have to hand now...
Enjoy Worthing.
*sighs* jealously....
:)
Splendid!
I wish I were there.
Is it true that it's impossible to interact with the English without making jokey, ironic comments or talking about the weather? Is it also true that they can't accept compliments without embarrassment?
Hmmm, I'll have to test that out. I'll tell Ammon that he is a God among SEOs, and I'll see how flushed he gets.
I can have fanclub buttons made up if that helps. Tell him he's got a nice smile (and we know that's rare for the English - kidding! Kind of) and get a picture if possible.
All these problems with asking for the restroom...tsk tsk. Either loo, lavvy, or if you were feeling like lapsing into Northern vernacular - bog - would have sufficed :)
Brown sauce - also known as Daddy's sauce, or HP sauce is pretty much the same thing as A-1 Steak sauce, although brown sauce is a much more descriptive name ;)
And it sounds so much more appetizing ;)
I happen to be a huge fan of lima beans. There was a period of about a year in my life when it was all I would eat.
Tell Will that the whiskey won't age in the bottle. He might as well drink it now!
If you want brown sauce at its best, have it with a full English Breakfast - lovely!
Hey Mike - it's alright - it's still in the cask...
Distilled 2000, to be bottled 2015.
That's the A Dram in Time site I mentioned over on the 'Share your Sites' thread...
I'm with you on the brown sauce :)
Just a quicky... Well, two really...
First, I've been reading SEOMoz for longer than is really good for me (at a guess). I work as an SEO codemonkey in Kent, England.
Second, next time you're around on our side of the pond, or if you're still around later this week (after Wednesday), give me a shout and I'll take you to THE best coffee shop in London :) I live about 45 minutes away.
Oh, and just thought of a third - I've got a book (The Common Sense Guide to Website Marketing on marketing websites (not just your normal SEO/PPC stuff, although that's in there too) coming out soon. If you want a copy (pdf or hardback), give me a shout and I'll send one over when it's released.
Thanks, Pete. Shoot me an email and we can chat about it.
Sent
Aww, that's what I though too! All your pictures reminds me of London and how I want to go back someday. You see the Rosetta stone in the British Museum? That was cool. I also did a pub crawl that went right by the tower of London, to which I got a free T-Shirt I sometimes sport at the office!
Yup, I Rosetta stoned it up. Pretty neat!
I saw the pub crawl advertised and thought of my fellow drunkard co-worker. Well, not really, but I did just now.